Friday, January 29, 2010

in the bedroom

Hello. I told you we may try a video blog today, and this is what we came up with.

I should note (my mom says) that there is a TV on the other side of the curtains that can be closed off! TV is not romantic!
these are the itso cubes and you can get them at Target.

Here is a suggestions.
This duvet set is from Target, totally gender neutral. The piping is yellow. So instead of painting the bedroom bright sunshiny yellow, go with a smokey grey. (and yes, you can do dark wood with grey!)
Add some elements/details of yellow, white, glass and silver and call it smokey hot!

check out Target for more

These vases are studly!!

Bud vases on the dresser would be so cute!

these are from Crate and great.
Shiny silver lamp with white shade would look amazing against a grey wall.

Funky art work, if you don't know anyone who is an artist check out Urban Outfitters.
cute yellow towel, or clothes hook...for a little funk.
this is the little door pull from target we put on the itso's.
Put it together and VIOLA! Remember it is good to have elements that are classy and elements that bring the personality into the room!

Hope this is inspiring!!
Love to you!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

It's on the news

I thought this came as a timely news story since I have been talking about my own marriage journey.
Gayle Haggard just wrote a book about choosing to stay with her husband, Ted Haggard.She was featured this morning on the Today show, for some reason it isn't letting me post the link, but you should google "Today Show Gayle Haggard" and watch the video.
There was one thing she said that hit me the most. She said something along the lines of, "The night that he told me, we were in bed. He reached over to touch me and that was when I decided to choose to love him."
She is a good woman.

For some of us, loving our spouse or the people around us really isn't that difficult...but it is always a choice. We should not treat each other with the understanding that "they are going to love me no matter how I treat I can get away with it." What an un-fulfilling way to live.I pray that I am choosing to love Andrew and choosing to show it with my actions.I have heard people say, we hurt the ones we love the most, but if that is we really love them?

Let me know your thoughts...but one quick story before I go.

Andrew does the laundry (and the machine is in the basement). We have been "not home" so much that all the clean laundry is in like 7 piles in our bedroom. The duvet was sitting on the bed for 3 days and I am sure this had been driving Andrew crazy (he is clean). I mean, he does the laundry and I am supposed to fold it and then we put it away last night Andrew knew I wanted some jeans cleaned and so he ran a load while students were over for Bible study. When they left he went back down to switch them to the dryer. As he walked out of the room, I thought, "this is my opportunity to put the downed comforter into the duvet...All without his help...It will be a surprise." Which is totally silly because I should have done it three days ago, but I usually use his help. So he gets up stairs and I put on my "look what I'm doing" with a little kid smile face. He doesn't say anything...booooSo then I actually say, "I thought I would do something too!" to which he replies in a really sarcastic, little kid sounding voice, "Well that's a nice change!"This was my opportunity to try to tackle him, when I couldn't I just jumped on the bed like a crazy person while he shook his head in amazement at what a freak I am.So, the moral of today's story...HAVE FUN, Jump on your clean bed!
We were thinking about doing a video blog post on Friday. So, if there is anything you want us to chat about...well, we are open to suggestions. Just leave a comment and we will see what we can do!
Love ya,

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

there is a difference

I have heard it said that we shouldn't make our time with God a "habit". I understand what people are saying. They don't think that you should make something so important just another thing you do because you are used to doing it. I get that, but habits and schedules are not so different, I believe it is just the motivation behind being habitual that decided whether it is actually good or bad. But there is a difference.
That being said, in our home a schedule is the hardest thing to keep. We are up at different times each day. The week to week stuff is similar, but from day to day it is different. The single most important thing in our lives is the Lord. It Is. And we would both say that it is. So, when we are not in a right relationship with God, we are not in a right relationship with each other. So, time with the Lord is a priority. The thing is, we work for a church and it is easy to confuse studying to teach with studying for personal faith development. There is a difference. We found it hard to separate those the first year or so of ministry, but have come to KNOW that our personal faith development is KEY to our marriage, ministry and lives. This is how we have made the Lord the focus of our day.
Andrew sets the alarm...wakes up, hits snooze...turns up the heat and brews the coffee...alarm sounds...I turn it off and meet him by the couch with a cup of coffee...we greet each other...
Every day he says "good morning" (with a smile, of course) and then asks how I slept. I tell him about the weird dream I had and ask him how he slept. We kiss and then I sit on the opposite end of the couch as him. Then we read. Sometimes for 15 minutes and some times for an hour. We read the Bible, I journal and sometimes we will pick up Closer,The devotion I previously mentioned, and do that. And then we pray. Sometimes together out loud and sometimes in silence, but together nonetheless. At some point one of us decides to take a shower and that is the beginning of our day.
I cherish the time I get to sit in silence reading and learning knowing that the man whom with I share my life is learning too. This is a sacred thing.
I hope that you understand that my marriage is what it is because it is second most important. Andrew and I love each other, but we love God more. And whether you are single, married or have kids...Being in a right relationship with God is the key to having any other good relationship. Galatians 5:16 says, "walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh." and we may spend too much time being selfish, spending too much time focused on our kids, blaming our spouse, or nagging, or complaining, or feeling sorry for ourselves for missing out on our "glory" days by getting married so young...but the truth is that all of those inclinations are of the flesh and we are told that if we "Walk by the Spirit, we will not gratify the flesh."
This is not necessarily an easy thing to do...but definitely something that we should be striving for.
What do you think...

Monday, January 25, 2010

I'm exhausted

Exhausted, but not too exhausted to blog today! Yea for two post in a week! So, this week was a long one...really. From last Sunday to the end of last night, and I only figured this out to make a point, we worked 104 hours. YES, in one week. When I told Andrew that this morning, he said "did you count sleep time?" "okay 96, but being in charge of students on a trip does not make for restful sleep." The point I was trying to make was for you, my fine friends. Andrew and I literally worked 104 hours in an 8 day period. While that is a 3 day youth retreat/conference and five 10-12 hour days we still went on a date last week. Andrew bought me Lovely Bones for Christmas (I am on this kick of reading books that are getting ready to be released as movies) and so he took me to see it last week in the afternoon between staff meeting and Bible Study. My point of telling you this is not to say "this is how you do it" but to say "find or make time for you as a couple." Last week would have been the perfect time to say "no" to doing anything extra and no we didn't have time to make dinner before students showed up that night, but you know what, We had fun going out on a date. The key is know where to go for cheap. AMC theaters show $5.oo movies M-T, and there is a theatre here that on top of that has a bring your own bowl Tuesday where you can bring in any bowl and get free popcorn! take advantage of those fun things.

We got home yesterday from the conference and had an hour before we had to be back up to church. We squeezed in a nap and got back up there. We took 83 people to see To Save a Life, you should check it out. Anyway, we got home for the night around 10:30pm. At this point we were so exhausted but almost to that point where you can't fall asleep...we had DVR'd the Hope for Haiti and decided to put that on while we did little things around the house. So the telethon is playing and I hear someone singing and look up and didn't recognize his voice or his looks and I say, "who is that?" and Andrew looks at me with shock and awe and says. "Bruce Springsteen...The BOSS" so I say. "I know who he is, it just didn't look like him, he looks to professional...whatever" then we laugh at time goes by and the next guy starts singing. It was only like three words in and I couldn't figure out who it was either and so as I am getting ready to ask who it was, but before the words came out, I looked up. Three words. Dreads, sun-glasses, black...yeah that's right, I almost asked who Stevie Wonder was!!!! Instead of just being quiet I say, "I am soooo glad I looked up." Two reasons this story was funny to us. 1. When we clean house we listen to his greatest hits, and 2. Stevie Wonder is AMAZING, and was on the Cosby show...which doesn't really matter but is fun to know.

One more story for you to giggle at. Tonight on our way home from the office we stopped to get groceries and as we got into our car it didn't start. We called Anne, my amazing mother in law, and she agreed to come get us. You should know that we don't have heat in the car anyway so it was really as she pulled into the parking lot, Andrew tried once more and the car started. She followed us home. by the time we get home and I am just FREEZING and if you know me, I hate being cold. So, I crank the heat in the house and let Andrew call the repair shop. When he hangs up I am whining about being cold, he reaches out for my hand and says, "Lets hug over the vent." I think this sounds like a funny invitation so I walk over and we stand on the vent hugging and laughing. this is how the rest played out...

I tell him I love him and he says, "you know the best way to get warm?" and of course I know the answer he was looking for and I laugh and say "How Andrew?" and he says "body heat." to which I reply with the action of rubbing the palm of my hand on his bearded face asking him if it is working. Then he says, "Yeah, yeah, you know what is really cold?" at this point we are both cracking up and he didn't even wait for my response, "my whole front side!" now I am outright laughing and I say, "Can I blog that?" his reply..."Well it does show how funny I am!"
Laughter makes you healthy.

On a more serious note, we have started a devotion by Jim and Cathy Burns called Closer and it is the best one we have ever done, so if you are looking for something to do that doesn't take too much time, you should check it out. Check back tomorrow, I am looking forward to tomorrow's post.
Here is a pic I took looking out my window and thought it was appropriate for a story about cold. Love and peace to you and yours,

Friday, January 22, 2010

How Time Flies By

Well, I hope you are not disappointed in me...I guess it has been so long that there will be months before you even check to see if I have been here. Well, here I am. I have been evaluating my blogging life recently and Andrew and I have been talking about trying something.
If you didn't know we actually work together everyday...all day...there are not many hours in a week that we aren't physically in the same room (and I am counting bathroom time in the separation.) The thing is. We Love It. Like, really, really love it. I would be a millionaire if I had a buck for every time someone asked me. "how can you two stand being together all the time? My husband and I would kill each other." ....hmmm....
I guess I can "see" where people are coming from, but at the same time, my heart hurts a little bit for the folks who wouldn't want to spent a lot of time with their husband.
This last year was a rough one for the marriages around me. I watched so many friends walk through some real struggles and some of them made it, some of them are hopeful for restoration and some of them are over. It was tough to watch the process and try to speak to the people who are walking through it.
It is a weird thing to us that so many people are so horrible to their spouses. Andrew and I don't fight. We discuss and we never get angry and yell...we do get our feelings hurt and then we talk it out. It is hard for us to relate to a fighting couple, yet we are surrounded by them.
One of the things that cracks me up, so hard, are the people who say, "Oh, well you are still in the honey moon period." It cracks me up because in July we will celebrate 5 years and of the marriages I have watched struggle this year almost all of them were rocky way before 5 years...and some of them haven't made it anywhere near 5 years.
Now, we don't have kids and people tell me that is a huge stress point, but I don't think, and I am firm in this can point and laugh later...that kids are going to make me scream at Andrew and tell him that he is an idiot...

Our story is different, I get that, we weren't high school sweet hearts...but that story is saved for a later date.

So the idea we had was to write about our marriage and what it looks like to live in our house. We are weird and we have so much fun, and you may be bored by our life, but maybe we can inspire you to love your spouse and bring some fun back into your day. Because when you are with your spouse for 24/7 you have to is not an option.

So the other day, Andrew walked outside to take out the trash. It was 2 degrees outside and like 10 inces of snow on the ground. Needless to say he was bundled up. Coat, hat, boots, know, it was 2 degrees. While he was taking out the trash, I was brushing my teeth...I hear the door shut and him walking through the house. Then he yells through the house. "Its so cold out there I froze my socks and shoes off!"...I giggle a little, walk out of the room to see him and say..."I haven't heard that one before" and while I am speaking I look at him completely bundled up and I look down...and of course...He was still totally bundled up (hat and all) and with his size 9 winter white bare feet sticking out under his wet jeans.

If you were there, you would have laughed too. These are the tiny things in life that keep us newly weds. He could have complained about taking out the trash..instead he told a joke. I love that man.

Talk to you soon. (Don't worry, I will also have pics and creative things to bring to the blog!)